Pasos para encontrar el amor en tu vida – Magui Block Psicoterapéuta

Possibly, you've heard that what is outside is inside, and that to find the love someone else you have to start by loving you. Life is a mirror, and you will receive the others as you feel for yourself. So, first, you have to make you love yourself and then share with others what you have inside. This flow of love towards yourself and towards others will make you attract the love of your life.

Where do you start to receive love?

1. To understand the origin of the problem

You learn to love as was the treatment that you received and felt in your first few years of life. If in your childhood you were treated with respect and kindness, this will be normal, and adult look naturally, without effort. If, on the contrary, what you knew was violence and abuse, you'll have to be alert, and make a personal work to be able to free yourself from the patterns limiting that thou wast created.

This is further complicated by your life experiences, models that accounted for your parents and authority figures, the limiting beliefs of the systems to which you belong, the patterns of family legacy and the dynamics that have built-in without question, and that dominate the way in which you respond to others —to attract what you get—.

For example, Inma learned that to love is to sacrifice for others and has a habit of thinking in all except her. So did his mother and his grandmother. Inma you want a partner, but does not attract anyone worth.

2. Integrate the love in your daily life

If the love and acceptance were not a part of your childhood, you'll have to learn as a new language. You will need to re-educate your mind and your body to appreciate your unique qualities and to recognize your own value; take care of yourself in a healthy way, and to accept and love yourself as you are. An important step in this process is to fill your tidy place in the system —the one that corresponds to you—. Imagine that you put in the first place, without neglecting your duties and responsibilities with the others, leaving thinking that by doing it you're selfish or a bad person. Visualize yourself doing it, make a plan with small concrete actions and then go and take the first steps in that direction.

Continuing with the example, Inma you decide to put yourself first and make a list of what is important to her, placing among the first places to sleep enough hours. She recognizes that it is evening watching the television because you get alone in her bed it hurts.

3. Recognize and prioritize acting in accordance

If when you were small you wanting to receive validation, the more likely it is that now you take away the importance of that affects you and you need to. Acknowledge your values; separates what you like or not, and prioritizes properly without criticarte or compare yourself with others. All of this is going to help you to strengthen your sense of worth. Listen and validate what you want is an important step in the process of cultivating the love. Once you know what is a priority for you, choose what you would like to do in a concrete way.

In the case of Inma, this would be to give more voice to their needs and to take responsibility to be satisfied. She asked what time would you like to fall asleep and how you like it to be that moment, becoming aware that she can make the experience happy.

4. To acquire the resources you need

If you are not clear on what you like, you have doubts, you feel confused, or you lack the strength to make the changes and perform the actions that you take to treat you with love, you need to acquire skills and resources to achieve it. Many times you need help to break patterns that have been there for years on your system; help someone else save you years of suffering.

Although Inma already realized that you don't sleep enough, and this is undermining their health, still you are struggling to go to sleep for the loneliness that you feel. Sometimes it does, but, typically, what evades with the tv and the food, making the larger your discomfort. It is as well as decide to go to a few private sessions and feel with the clarity and the strength to make the changes you need. This makes you feel better and will soon be reflected in the appeal which it emanates. To love and care for, gets more love and care of the people around them. Your dream of a couple become a reality.

Each step in the path to self-love is one towards a life more full and satisfactory. Remember that the method METHOD it is of great help in this journey.